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I've been thinking this week that there is a fine line between honoring one's feelings and healing, and wallowing in them. Can you tell I've been reading Martha Beck? I'm so good at being a victim and drowning in self pity and emotional negativity.
Do you know I have not had even one single day without thinking about my former husband since he left. Usually just in passing or when waking from a dream but still! We've been divorced for over 5 years. That is ridiculous!
Losing Sophie has brought up all those sad feelings again but I've got a handle on it now. I did the right thing for Sophie and while I am sad, I do not have regrets. I only feel immense gratitude for her unconditional love, her humor, her trust in me, and her stellar company.
It's been hard being here without her and I have yet to go in my pool by myself because I miss her so much. But gratitude is winning over sorrow and I'm feeling a little less like I'm pushing through sludge to get to the end of each day now.
So. just had to get that out and now I'll be going about my day.

giving thanks